The Map

[00:00:00] Welcome back. [00:00:03] Today we're diving into the map. [00:00:10] If you're about to go on an adventure on a road trip, I'm sure you'd like to know the map. How are you going to get there from here? What are the stages? What are the processes? What are the things you're going to enjoy along the way? Along the way to completely clearing out all the things that have held you back. [00:00:32] So let's go through some of the adventures and wonders that will be experienced on our journey together. [00:00:39] And in all transparency. I recorded this entire session last night, and I'm recording it again this morning because it wasn't quite right. It was too long. So I'm going to give you the short version today. [00:00:55] So here is where we are now. We've already discovered that perfectionism is a prison that has trapped us from doing our sacred work and has stopped us taking action. [00:01:14] And that we can get out of that prison by realizing that we are in a jail, that we are in an invisible prison, and that it has ruined our life already and it will ruin our future. And we might not have much time. We don't know when we're going to die, and we don't want to die with our song inside. So we need to get on with it today. [00:01:37] So the first thing is just recognizing the situation. We have become trapped by our programs, by our limiting beliefs. It's not our fault. [00:01:48] We were programmed since we were children, and here we are now, deprogramming ourselves, freeing ourselves. [00:01:59] The second thing that is very powerful is to realize that what is really holding us back is different from what we think is holding us back. [00:02:12] Because when a hero on a hero's journey decides to finally say yes to the adventure, then immediately there is the refusal of the call. [00:02:26] I want to do it, but I can't because of all these things. So all that stuff is going to come back when you really commit to what you want. [00:02:34] And we have these excuses like, I don't have enough training. The market is saturated. I'm not good enough. [00:02:43] And all of these excuses seem legitimate to us, which is why we believe them. [00:02:50] You're going to learn a method to see your thoughts and feelings from a place, an expanded place where they lose all their power. So all these programs and beliefs currently have massive power over us, and we believe they are true. And you're going to learn how to experience your own thoughts and feelings from a safe space where the power they have over you dissolves like a cloud in the sky. [00:03:27] And you realize these are just thoughts. They're not truths, they're just passing, fleeting thoughts. [00:03:36] And you are the infinite presence, living in a state of freedom and power. [00:03:51] And as you do that, the walls of the jail start to crumble and you come in into an expanded feeling or freedom. [00:04:08] So instead of thinking, I can't do it, it's too hard, no one will like it, you notice I'm just noticing that my mind is saying they won't like it. [00:04:28] Just noticing that I think it's not going to work. [00:04:32] And that thought passes by like traffic moving on a road, and it loses its power. [00:04:49] And as we do this enough, all of these things start to fall away, and you can regain your strength to do whatever you want. [00:05:01] The next stop on our journey is discovering your Dharma and understanding that your dharma, your divine duty, your purpose for being on this planet is to take action. [00:05:17] The only thing we have a right to in the world is the right to take action. [00:05:23] We have no right to certain outcomes. [00:05:30] You have a right to do your very best from your heart, but you have no right to things working out the way you want. [00:05:41] And oftentimes we're so obsessed with the outcomes, with the money, with the success, with the fame, with the reviews that it cripples us from taking the action. [00:05:56] And so once you understand your Dharma, you realize that your responsibility is simply to act. [00:06:04] And then you surrender it up to God and the universe to take care of the rest. [00:06:12] We are not responsible for the outcomes. We are responsible for the inputs for the actions. [00:06:20] This sounds simple, but actually living like this is a major and profound shift in consciousness that releases anxiety, releases stress, and it allows you to live in freedom. [00:06:42] Along our journey, we're also going to discover the only way to success. And this is absolutely critical because most people have not realized this. Perfectionism makes us think the only way to be successful is to be perfect and do everything perfect all the time, which is a total lie and actually impossible. [00:07:06] The only way anyone is going to become successful in anything is by taking imperfect action and gradually learning and improving. [00:07:25] Gradually learning and improving. For example, you might look at your favorite author's 10th book and think, they're so talented. How do they do this? They're just so good at this. I could never do this. [00:07:36] The truth is, they started out really bad. They were absolutely no good at writing. They couldn't do anything, and they did it anyway. And then they got some feedback, and then they made it slightly better, and then they got more feedback and they made it slightly better. And over a period of months and years, they became really good at what they do through iteration, through doing and learning and doing and learning and doing and learning. Perfectionism stops us doing anything to get the learning that allows us to go to the next level and keep moving forward. [00:08:14] The only way that the iPhone is good is because they did the first one, which wasn't very good, and then they made it a little bit better. Bit better, A bit better. And now it's this highly addictive thing that's taken over the world. [00:08:26] So it can be used for any purpose, any company, any program. Anything that's happened that has ended up powerful is done through iteration. [00:08:36] Slight changes. [00:08:38] Learning, growing, learning, growing. In other words, do a bad job, get a little bit better, do a bad job, and get a little bit better. Once you accept that, once you really understand that's the only way, and you embrace imperfect action with joy in your heart, everything happens. [00:09:00] The next thing we're going to learn on our journey is what is the standard? Because this is what holds a lot of us back. Yes, but I agree I need to do something, but it's just not good enough. It really isn't good enough. It's not good enough, Right? So we have these impossible standards in our head about what is actually good enough to share with people or what is good enough to do. [00:09:20] And I want you to know that the standards of perfectionism are unattainable. We have standards in our mind about what we think is good enough, which is literally not possible to achieve because it's an internal, subjective reality. And we keep saying it's not good enough yet. Not good enough yet, not good enough yet. You're going to learn a method about what is actually good enough. [00:09:45] And it's something you are definitely capable of right now. So you are already good enough, exactly where you are to move forward. And we're going to establish exactly what that is so that when you do take these imperfect actions, you can feel confidently that that is good enough, and it will lead you to doing all these wonderful things that you want to do. [00:10:12] Next thing we're going to learn on our journey is why being real makes you rich in every sense. [00:10:22] Because one of the main things that holds us back is we think, well, I can't be honest, I can't be authentic. I can't be real, because people won't like me the way I am. I have to pretend I'm perfect. I have to only show the perfect picture of my cappuccino and my special sandwich, you know, on Instagram. Do you know what I mean? Like the whole curated. Oh, perfect, perfect, perfect, right? [00:10:45] But actually, you're going to learn why being authentic and real and vulnerable actually is the way to make more money in today's world. [00:10:55] And there are countless examples you're going to discover from real people who do this. And they have huge followings and they are very, very wealthy. One of them is, of course, Oprah. [00:11:07] She has hurt throughout her whole career, been extremely honest about all of her problems and imperfections and weight issues and food issues and all kinds of stuff. She is a multi billionaire, extremely influential person because she has been vulnerable and relatable. [00:11:28] You're also going to learn about the fake guru trap and why it's so important to take off the costume. If you think that you have to be some special guru that's super perfect all the time and everything you do is, is, is perfect, it is an absolute disaster. You're going to have a lot of fun listening to this session where we go, go into why trying to look perfect all the time and be perfect is exhausting because it's not true. [00:11:59] You have to pretend that everything is one way, when in fact it's a different way. If you do happen to do something wrong, which of course you will, because we are not perfect, then if you put yourself on a pedestal and then you fall, then you have to deal with the repercussions of that. But if you don't try and pretend that you're perfect in the first place, then there's no need for this pride before the fall. There's no need for scandals. There's no need for all this crazy stuff that you see all the time. If you're just authentic and honest and you stop trying to be a guru, then you can enjoy yourself. You free up all this energy and you're more relatable and it's more fun, right? And there are so many fake gurus around, and we know they're all fake. [00:12:48] So you can release that whole thing and people will love you for it. Isn't that great? [00:12:58] You're also going to learn that there are different ways you can teach where you are at. [00:13:06] Choose your lane. [00:13:10] Many people think, well, I haven't got anything original to share with the world. I haven't come up with some massive new idea, this breakthrough, big idea that no one has ever come up with. So why should anyone listen to me? Because there's all these books and courses and programs and everything else. Anyway, here's the thing. There are three types of teachers. [00:13:33] There's the Pioneer, which is about 0.0001% of the population. There's almost no pioneers at all who came up with something truly original. [00:13:44] Then there are the translators. [00:13:47] And these are the people who take ideas and share what they learn. So they read the books or do the courses and they say here's this thing that I learned. I haven't applied it myself. I'm not pretending I have. But here's what it is. And I think it's great. [00:14:00] There are loads of teachers who are very successful who have just translated or learned things and shared them. [00:14:09] So you can just share what you've learned from other people and be very successful. [00:14:15] Right. Isn't that great to know? You don't have to be perfect. You don't have to even applied everything that you're learning and you can still help people and still make money. And that's normally where we start. When I started teaching meditation I had no idea what I was talking about. I really had no idea. I hadn't hardly done any meditation. I did it. My first class was after one month and I was. I was sitting there like what even is that? But I shared what someone had taught me and it helped the people in the group. [00:14:46] So you don't actually have to embody and be an expert and come up with the ideas to help other people and get paid. And the third type is what we call the practitioner. These are the coaches and guides. The people who have learned something, implemented it in their own life. Maybe they've learned a few different things and now they're sharing some new way of saying something that they've heard from their own experience. And that's where you end up over time. But you can start as a translator just by sharing whatever you've heard. [00:15:22] Isn't that great? So in other words, you don't have to be perfect at all. You don't have to have applied anything at all in order to help other people. [00:15:31] We're also going to learn the Oprah method which is a method I developed based on Oprah where you can share honestly where you're at, what you're learning and just be one step ahead. [00:15:45] So you can start wherever you are. [00:15:49] This means that there's no reason whatsoever for you not to be sharing and helping people. Once you start applying the Oprah method, then all the excuses oh, I can't do it because of this. I can't do it because of that. They're all removed. [00:16:06] You're also going to learn why failing is how we succeed. [00:16:12] And the growth mindset. [00:16:15] This deserves its own session all of these things are going to have a lot of detail. I'm just giving you the map here. [00:16:24] There are two mindsets, the growth mindset and the fixed mindset. The fixed mindset, in essence, is that we feel, unless I'm naturally good at something straight away, then I shouldn't be doing it. [00:16:38] In other words, I'm as good as I'm going to be today and I'm not going to get any better by practicing. That's what people, a lot of people genuinely believe this, and we're all perfectionists here, otherwise we wouldn't be listening to this course. [00:16:49] On some level, we think, well, if I'm not very good at it now, I'm probably never going to be any good at it. The truth is, you become good at anything by failing and learning and growing. And this is such an important lesson that I'm not going to give you much more detail than this. But I want you to know that once you start really understanding this growth mindset and you get out of this fixed mindset, this trapped mindset, you can become good at absolutely anything. And you actually enjoy failing, trying and failing and learning and growing. [00:17:29] Once I learned this and really started using it, my entire life changed. [00:17:34] It kind of opened up the doors to infinite possibility where before I was totally trapped. [00:17:43] You're also going to learn how little things become miracles. [00:17:48] The 1% compound revelation. In other words, you don't need to be particularly better at anything on any day. [00:17:58] So right now, today, you can do a little bit of something like you are listening to this program, doing these little shifts you're making, and just by getting 1% better or even half a percent better between today and tomorrow, and tomorrow you get just a tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny percent better than you were. And the next day, just a little bit, you end up 37 times better at the end of one year. [00:18:32] Right? You can become extremely good at anything in a year by just getting slightly tiny, tiny bit better every day. [00:18:44] So that takes all the pressure off. You're not like, oh, I have to be so perfect all the time. No, you can be really bad at something, but you're slightly better at it the next day and slightly better the next day and slightly better the next day. And then a year from now, you will be exceptionally good because of this attitude. And you're going to learn exactly how to use this. It's going to change your life. [00:19:07] You're also going to learn about the critics, the haters. What about the haters? What about the critics? What about the people who you're worried about, who won't like you. Whether it's friends and family or random people on the Internet and the trolls and all the nonsense. Right. [00:19:24] It's not the critic who counts. We, we have to address this directly because I know at the back of your head, on some level, and I still have this now, right? I, I have literally over a hundred thousand reviews for my various programs, workbooks and everything. [00:19:41] And I would say somewhere around 95ish percent are all positive, which is quite a high percentage depending on what it is. Some, some of the stuff is less than that, some of them it's more than that. But on average or somewhere around 90, 95%. [00:19:58] But it's those 5% reviews. Oh my. I didn't like it. And they really get to me. I mean, I've got better at it and that's why we have this session. But I'm telling you, this is the stuff that can hold us back. [00:20:10] I have been totally derailed and had bad days because of this stuff. I'm like, these one star reviews, I'm like, how could they. I put my heart. [00:20:20] So we have this directly because in the back of our head we're paranoid to share anything in case stuff like this happens. It is gonna happen. [00:20:31] So we have to deal with it and we're going to deal with it very directly in this session. [00:20:37] As I was researching for this program, I looked for some quotes and Taylor Swift has a good one. Haters gonna hate, hate, hate. That's her quote. Eminem. Eminem says behind every successful person is a pack of haters. We're probably not going to have a massive pack. They'll just be the occasional random comment from random people. But we are going to look at all this so that we don't get derailed when that happens, which of course it will, because you can never please everyone. And if you try and please everyone, you will be suppressed and not able to share from your heart. [00:21:15] We're also going to dive into how to feel our feelings without suppression. Because at the end of the day, what we're actually really worried about is feeling bad. [00:21:31] The core behind all of this, the real thing is I don't want to feel negative emotions. [00:21:40] I don't want to fail because I'll feel bad. I don't want to put something out there because if someone says they don't like it, then I'll feel bad. I don't want to do something that's difficult because I'll feel bad. [00:21:51] I don't want to try Something because someone might not like it, I might fail, and then I'll feel bad. So if you take it back to the root, we are basically worried about feeling bad or even feeling good. You know, sometimes we might feel so happy, so joyful that that is too much for us, right? So we, we have this, this, what you could say is like a thermostat of our. The sort of feelings that we're letting ourselves have, right? It's like a temperature. [00:22:23] We're allowing ourselves a certain level of happiness, a certain amount of sorrow, and there's like a range. As soon as it goes below that or above that, we start freaking out and we'll do everything in our powers to bring it back. We get too happy, we act out. If we get too unhappy, we act out. [00:22:39] That's why there's so many addictions around. That's why there's so many coping mechanisms. Because fundamentally we can't handle our feelings. [00:22:49] So you're going to learn how to be okay with your feelings so that all this stuff becomes a much, much, much, much easier and more manageable. [00:23:00] And this, these are all skills that you're going to use in your whole life, in every area, for years to come. [00:23:09] There's so much more we're going to learn along our journey, which I'm not going to tell you about now because it's a surprise. [00:23:15] But these are some of the key milestones or the magical places we're going to meet, we're going to pass through, we're going to enjoy. [00:23:27] So I'd love to hear from you. What did you learn from this? [00:23:31] Or what did you relearn? What have you heard before that perhaps you've known about but haven't done anything about? [00:23:37] What is new knowledge? [00:23:39] And are you excited? Are you excited to go on this magical adventure and really enjoy these destinations and really go deep so that by the time we reach where we want to be, we are enjoying the journey itself along the way. Because end of the day, life is a journey and you will reach a point in your life through doing these practices and going deep in yourself where you feel at peace with everything, no matter what, where the thoughts no longer have power over you, where you no longer have unreasonable expectations for yourself and for the world, where you see things and feel things as they are, and where these limiting beliefs lose their hold so that you can do whatever you want with ease and grace, with a smile on your face and enjoy the whole process. [00:24:37] Thank you for being here and I'll talk to you in the next session.